Spring Fever!

We had another 2 hour delay due to snow and ice yesterday. I had watched the weather forecast, but I wasn't too worried about it. I was shocked by my 5:20 a.m. ConnectEd call telling me about the delay. As I pulled on my ugly Ugg boots for the umpteenth time to head out in the snow, I thought about how much I'm looking forward to spring. My spring break is a mere four weeks away, and I'm hoping to hold on that long. I think I might have the record for the longest I've gone without seeing this sweet and sassy girl-

I last saw her on Christmas!!! I plan on heading down to the Volunteer state for a few days. This will make her mother very happy, as she loves to see her sister for extended periods of time. I am an awesome houseguest. I remove all of your tags for free. Unfortunately, I also demand a lot of fruit and I will request a swim in your giant bathtub. Anyway, the person who loves my visits the most is my brother in law. He loves to spend copious amounts of time with me, and we often just sit in the kitchen, sipping tea and talking for hours.

The best thing about Chip and Caroline is that they look exactly alike. I can't stress this enough. The child received none of our genes, except she does run like her mother.

Right?

C &C are so much alike that I often giggle because they remind me of my all time favorite Disney characters, Tuck and Roll. They are identical, act the same and finish everything with a clap and a "ta-da!"

I can't wait to see them, really.

A few short weeks after Spring Break, I will watch the Royal Wedding.

Kate is wearing a fascinator, and boy does she fascinate me. She is a beauty. He once looked like his mother. As 30 draws near, he now has taken on the horsey features of his father and Princess Margaret. That is rather unfortunate. My mother is in full swing with excitement over this weekend. We have talked about it almost as much as we discussed my own nuptials. Speaking of which, I'm trying to talk Sweet T into planning a lovely one year anniversary trip this summer.

I want to go somewhere warm and tropical. Tropical! Why you must mean Island Pink Tory Burch medallion shoes? Why, yes I do! I'm ready for some warmness to sport these cheery bits of perfection.

Lastly, I'm dying to see this cinematic creation on Memorial Day weekend. I so loved the original Hangover. It's not my normal type of comedy, but I thought it was brilliant. I'm looking forward to seeing the Wolf pack again. Check out the monkey. I think monkeys are hilarious. Remember Marcel from Friends? He was great until they had to remove him from the show because he liked to bite Jennifer Aniston or something.

A Personality Test

So my darling sister calls me tonight and insists that I take this personality test. I've heard of these things before, as they are used to help people find their best careers, interests, etc. I was hesitant to take it. Katie insisted. It went like this-

K: "Please take it."

B: "I know what my personality type is already. Selfish jerk. I'm well aware of my shortcomings."

K: "Don't be silly. That's not one of the options."

So with her pushiness, which is not a part of her personality by the way, I took it.

I went to this website:

www.humanmetrics.com

and clicked on Jung Typology Test.

I took it and got my results. No sooner had I read through my profile was my sister calling for my personality.

She began with hers. Katie, and also my mother, are Guardian Protectors. Duh! Their personalities:

We are lucky that Protectors make up as much as ten percent the population, because their primary interest is in the safety and security of those they care about - their family, their circle of friends, their students, their patients, their boss, their fellow-workers, or their employees. Protectors have an extraordinary sense of loyalty and responsibility in their makeup, and seem fulfilled in the degree they can shield others from the dirt and dangers of the world. And they cherish family history and enjoy caring for family property, from houses to heirlooms.

Wanting to be of service to others, Protectors find great satisfaction in assisting the downtrodden, and can deal with disability and neediness in others better than any other type. They are not as outgoing and talkative as the Provider Guardians [ESFJs], and their shyness is often misjudged as stiffness, even coldness, when in truth Protectors are warm-hearted and sympathetic, giving happily of themselves to those in need.

A famous Guardian Protector you might recognize? Mother Teresa.

I shared my results.

I am a rational fieldmarshall. Some of my personality traits include:

Hardly more than two percent of the total population, Fieldmarshals are bound to lead others, and from an early age they can be observed taking command of groups. In some cases, they simply find themselves in charge of groups, and are mystified as to how this happened. But the reason is that they have a strong natural urge to give structure and direction wherever they are - to harness people in the field and to direct them to achieve distant goals. They resemble Supervisors in their tendency to establish plans for a task, enterprise, or organization, but Fieldmarshals search more for policy and goals than for regulations and procedures.

They cannot not build organizations, and cannot not push to implement their goals. When in charge of an organization, whether in the military, business, education, or government, Fieldmarshals more than any other type desire (and generally have the ability) to visualize where the organization is going, and they seem able to communicate that vision to others.

A famous rational fieldmarshall? Napoleon.

Story of my life, peeps. I am bossy, judgmental, and I enjoy leading and being in charge. My sister and mother put everyone before themselves and are particularly attached to family heirlooms. I suggest you take this test, as it will likely confirm what you already know about yourself!

Chin National Day

My school district continues to have a growing number of English language learners. We are teaching more and more students from Burma. This past Saturday, the Chin community celebrated Chin National Day. They celebrate their culture with dances, food, speeches, and wrestling. That's right, I said wrestling. T was intrigued. I was excited to see many of my students and meet their families.

Here is one of my first graders wearing traditional Chin attire.

These two are fourth grade students.

WWF-Chin Style.

The men wrestled in front of the crowd. They wear belts and they have to be holding on to their opponent's belt at all times. It's super intense. There also appeared to be no weight classes, and they just rolled up their pant legs and grappled on the floor. The winner of each match went right on to the next match with no break. It looked exhausting.

I strategically placed myself behind this baby. At that point I lost all awareness of anything else around me.

We got a huge kick out of how huge we were and how conspicuous we were. I am an absolute giant around my students, but I was unprepared to feel the same way around their parents. At one point I started taking giant steps and huffing, "fee, fi, fo fum-"

Trinity took a picture to try and showcase his giantess wife.

I returned the favor. We had no difficulty seeing the matches from the very back. It was such a great afternoon.

Travels

I just returned from a three day trip to Little Rock for teacher training. I really enjoy that little city. Everyone is friendly and calls me darlin'. I think it is very charming. You know who I don't find charming? The Hiltons. I don't mean Paris and Nicky personally, but rather the hotel chain that has made them famous for doing nothing.

I am a card totin' Hilton Honors member. I always stay at Hilton hotels. Generally I am more than satisfied. I was dismayed to discover what I consider a scam. I'm hip to your game, Hilton Garden Inn. I am all about the green. I recycle. I'm cool. I actually pay attention to those little signs in the bathroom that say:

We value the environment, blah blah blah. A towel hung on the rack means leave it alone, I'll use it again. I eat granola, I wear Birkenstocks and I'm a female who doesn't shave my armpits. A towel on the floor says please exchange.

That's not the exact wording, but you get the gist. I hung up my towel. Each day. When I returned, I had a new towel. Now you may be wondering how I can tell one Hilton white cotton bath towel from the next. Think...wait for it...

Tag removal! I fastidiously inspect every fabric in my hotel room for tags. I take the time to carefully remove tags. I once used manicure scissors, found them to be inadequate for the task. Now I carry full size kitchen shears. I'm serious about this. It forces me to check my carry on size suitcase, since these are clearly a weapon, but that $25 is well spent.

So, I'm peeved Hilton. You aren't adhering to your signage. I have busted you. I am going to write a letter to address this issue immediately.

Moving on in my random thinking.

I'm hot. Remember the Kroger bag boy? Well, he got some competition today. I flew home via Memphis this afternoon. That airport is small and a tad janky. I had like two meal options. Popeye's, which sounds like it would be totally healthy, no? One might assume that they would specialize in spinach salads by the name alone. False advertising, peeps. Fried chicken legs, or if you prefer, fried chicken fingers. Chicken have fingers, I guess. My other option was Memphis style BBQ. Barf. I ended up enjoying a hearty lunch of baked multigrain chips and Reese's cups. I know how to keep it healthy. Okay, I have seriously digressed. Back to my hotness.

Prior to boarding, Delta solicited volunteers to be bumped. I popped up to the desk to see if I could be swayed. I wasn't. However, I got a little love from this man-

Little Richard.

My Delta agent was a dead ringer for Little Richard. I believe his name was Antoine, and he likey the Betsy. This was our interaction. I'll refer to him as DA, an acronym for Delta Agent, not District Attorney. This isn't an episode of Law & Order.

DA: "You are a cute girl."

Betsy: awkward look

DA: " I noticed you earlier strutting through the terminal."

Betsy: " Ummm. thanks?"

I was not intentionally strutting. I thought I was quickly shuffling away from the putrid smell of Popeye's.

He scanned my ticket to board 15 minutes later. I approached with trepidation.

DA: "I'm going to miiiiiiiiissssss you." wink;)

Vomit.

Valentine's Day

I love Valentine's Day. I always have, even when I was quite homely and had no hope of a Valentine. Why? I had this guy-

who assured me that one day a nice man would think I was beautiful. He was right. Now back to Valentine's Day and my dad. He totally did this holiday right. My mother, sister, brother and I would all get our own boxes from Fannie May. There was a Fannie May store in our mall, and we each got our own box! This was awesome as a child. He started by getting all 3 of his children the pre-selected red heart box. Leave it to his sassy middle child to let him know that she preferred peppermint ice, milk chocolate mays, and mint meltaways, none of which were included in the pre-made box. She also elaborated by voicing her disdain for caramels, which weighed down most of the heart box. From that year on, Dad hand picked the chocolates that went in all of our boxes. I'm telling you, the man is a sport. And I am an embarrassment.

So because of my dear dad, I have always loved the holiday. A day that celebrates love, chocolate and pink is easy for me to adore. The first V Day that I celebrated with Mr. T delivered this in the mail:

a wonderful book of poems by former Poet Laureate Ted Kooser. I want to be a Poet Laureate. It sounds awesome. I am doing poetry for the next few weeks with first graders. I write a mean haiku. Note to self: figure out how to become a laureate and make it happen. I remember getting this in the mail, 2 months after we met. I was touched, and thought it was very romantic.

Valentine's Day 2009 was a hoot. I was training to be a literacy coach, so I traveled to Little Rock, Arkansas once a month. I was flying out the Sunday of V Day weekend, so T and I met up for one night in Elizabethtown, KY at a very classy Days Inn. I got some pretty roses.

Valentine's weekend 2010 takes the cake. I got a very pretty sparkly.

I glowed at the thought of becoming a Mrs.

So now here we are, V Day 2011. Ironically, I'm currently in Little Rock, for more training. Yuck. T and I celebrated with a very low key Saturday evening.

I brought him cupcakes from here

and chocolate from here

and tried to act like those weren't totally gifts for me. I am tricky that way, but he's figured me out. He knows that dark chocolate truffles and Razzmatazz cupcakes don't float his boat like they do mine.

We picked up a pizza from here

and had our usual order. Whole wheat crust, 1/2 pepperoni, 1/2 garden, no black olives. Olives are narsty.

We then headed home to watch When Harry Met Sally on Netflix. This was a great suggestion from his parents, and I shamefully had never seen it. I loved Billy Crystal's character. He was totally snarky like me.

Happy Valentine's Day. I hope your plans are as awesome as mine. If you need me, I'll be eating Bang Bang Shrimp tacos solo at the Little Rock Bonefish Grill.

Dance, dance, dance!

We had an impromptu dance party after our fabulous sushi dinner. Tim showed me a special clap sequence, I did my usual two step and escalator moves, and my quote of the night was, "My belt is tight!" Ah, never a dull moment with us!

Aspen Extreme

We spent the last several days and nights with our friends Tim and Jamie in Aspen.

We arrived to this lovely place-

We immediately explored the charming town.

We did a lot of hot tubbing. This involved terry robes, boots and cocktails in paper cups for safety. Tim sported his ski goggles.

So did I.

It snowed as we tubbed it up.

We had drinks at JBar, in the Hotel Jerome.

We headed into town on our own one day, while Tim and Jamie were skiing. It was beyond beautiful.

We came to a bookstore and I found this-

so naturally, I did this.

We watched the Superbowl at The Hotel Jerome. We were jazzed that some Bronco cheerleaders were there to shake their fannies. I thought they were way more exciting than The Black Eyed Peas.

My husband agreed. He seems to have a thing for cheerleaders. That's clearly why he chose me.

Skiing, minus Betsy.

Buff modeling, recall our gifts from Pat and Eddie on Christmas.

Close up

Our big night out took us to Matsuhishu, Aspen's fabulous sushi joint.

Amazing!

A Little Fun with my Flip Camera

I'm now going on my 4th day without school. I just got the call that school is out again tomorrow. I was able to leave the house today. I went shopping and to yoga. It was lovely. I pulled out my little Flip camera this evening. Trinity had filmed this Kashmir video the other night. You can hear her precious little voice.

Speaking of voices, I did my best Raphael Sanchez reporter voice to film the video on the right. I tried to pause for dramatic effect. We looked out our front window this evening, while it is 22 degrees outside. We witnessed our neighbor, Linda. She is prone to odd behavior. I found this to be quite shocking.

I Should Be In Aspen...

but I'm not. Sassy Mother Nature has unleashed her wrath on the midwest. T and I were scheduled to leave last night for our adventure in Colorado, but all air travel has been suspended. School is cancelled. Did you know that you can spell cancelled both cancelled and/or canceled? I usually use the two l version, but was seeing the other spelling. I checked on that. I can't stand when things are not spelled correctly.

Back on topic, my trip was rescheduled. I'm not saying when. I can't have one of my ten readers break into my 1176 square foot castle and plunder it. I am internet saavy, you see. The great thing is that the trip will be better and we get to stay longer. It worked out nicely, and Frontier changed our tickets for no charge!

Speaking of my tiny castle, I'm tired of it. We had a snow, or rather "ice" day yesterday and today. This is rare, peeps. Recall I stayed home with the flu 3 days last week. I'm so tired of this place. I see a lot of this-

Princess K in her little sherpa lined donut thingy that my mother bought her. She didn't really get a cat suitcase bed from Etsy. That's just ridiculous.

I'm seriously bored. I got all jazzed about going to a noon pilates class at my studio today. Twas not to be. They decided to cancel it. Travel isn't all that safe right now.

I was forced to do this-

that's one jank pilates studio. My instructor wasn't great either. Ana Caban of Gaiam video fame. She's not funny and quirky like my normal girls. Plus I was by myself, hence no laughing at other people.

The weather was no match for my Chick-fil-a chargrilled chicken craving. T agreed to take me on an adventure. I hadn't left the house since Monday evening.

I got dressed and was excited.

Now, I've explained before that normally I move at a sloth like pace. Today was an exception. I bounded off my back steps like there wasn't an inch of ice on it, and I wasn't out of school due to travel hazards. Trinity claims I leaped out the back door.

This is the scene of the accident.

The unfortunate series of events went like this:

A whole lotta woman went tumbling ass first down those steps, all Jack and Jill like.

Feet out straight ahead, ass hits first step, boom down step 2 and lands on the sidewalk. Lower back hits lower step. Mouth opens, wailing commences. Husband leaps from truck to rush to big girl's side. Teacher friend Kathy drives by at just this second with her husband Rick and witnesses this entire debacle. They WAVE! It all happened so fast. I had to call her once I was again mobile and assure her that I had failed in my Olympic attempt to break my tailbone. She was greatly relieved.

I'm now back on the couch, recovering from my injuries, which most likely will include a bruised rump, back and shoulder. Pure grace, people, pure grace. This is why I won't be skiing in Aspen at an undisclosed time.