I entertained myself this morning by cleaning out some photos and cards from my desk. I found this pile of school photos and had to share them with some commentary.
I've mentioned before that I was once a young boy.
This is kindergarten, and I do love that little Peter Pan collar.
This is my grandmother. She loved me and accepted my transgendered appearance.
By 2nd grade I was a little girl. We can thank the Lord Jesus and the blessed mother Mary for that. We certainly won't thank my own mother and her propensity to cut my hair far too short. This is my First Communion.
Wasn't I angelic?
4th grade. Look at those teeth. That turtleneck was sweet. This was not bad. Things got far worse.
By 6th grade I bore a strong resemblance to Arlene.
Big lips and droopy eyes.
6th grade
Another turtleneck.
Katie attempts to cool me up by curling my bangs to resemble a lotus flower.
Her powers pale in comparison to those of the fang.
It has dropped.
Time for 4 years of extreme orthodontia.
I had a permanent Rolex imprint on my forehead for the next few years.
My orthodontist was 80 and was a heavy leaner with his left arm as he pulled at my teeth with his right.
Memories are beautiful.
No more teeth photos for the next few years.
The turtlenecks kept coming though.
This is 7th grade, right before I discovered that my hair was actually insanely curly if I didn't rake through it with an enormous paddle brush.
I learned a lot that year.
I think this might be 8th grade. That's my shadow, Robby. Curly hair is in full effect and I've exchanged turtlenecks for Double Denim, or denim on denim.
This might be a submission for Awkward Family Photos.
Robby is flexing with his badass muscles while I apparently am trying to keep child predators from entering our hotel room to prey on our juvenile model selves. The slope of that back, Betsy, you've still got it. My posture has remained unchanged.
I close with another favorite of the three of us. I believe I'm a sophomore at IU and Robby is a senior. Katie was a senior at IU. Mom didn't have her photographic skills yet, as she shot us directly into the sun.
The memories that these photos evoke are so special.
They are also good for boosting my self esteem.
2 comments:
Well, this post tops them all. Absolutely hysterical. You were a precious child, just not always photogenic!
The sweet first communion picture I am sure has a great deal to do with the instructions that were pasted out by your awesome teacher. What a proud moment to see you looking so angelic. I believe I see nubbs of wings sprouting....
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